The quarrel with her husband is normal and there is nothing abnormal in it, yet everyone has their own habits and opinions about some things that may not coincide. But if quarrels with her husband become permanent, then this is an alarming bell, which can not be ignored. It is important to understand the reasons for frequent quarrels with your husband and find a way how to avoid them.
Why do we constantly swear with my husband?
To answer the question of how to stop arguing with your husband or, at least, not so often, you need to understand why these quarrels are taking place. Therefore, after another quarrel, instead of crying to my friend "I quarreled with my husband," better think about why this happened and what was the reason for the other of your quarrels. Here are the most common causes of family conflicts.
- Underestimated self-esteem of your husband and as a consequence, an attempt to increase it at the expense of other people, those who seem weak to him and who can not resist.
- Family traditions - maybe in his family, relationships were built in this way and your husband simply does not know what can be otherwise, he has not been told about it.
- The removal of the grievances received at work, on the way home on the first person got. For example, his boss can not tell everything that thinks about him, but you can scream at you.
- Stress, fatigue, and illness can be the cause of increased irritability. Even the quietest person begins to get annoyed over trifles, if he feels bad.
- A quarrel can also occur due to the fact that on the way to the desired goal there are some obstacles. For example, a man is tired to hell, he does not even need dinner, only to get to the bed, and you start from him something to demand.
Often we quarrel with her husband, what should we do?
It is logical to assume that if you say "we are constantly arguing with my husband, I do not know what to do", then you would not so much like to emerge victorious from disputes, how much to understand how not to quarrel with your husband - after all, frequent quarrels in no way contribute to the acquisition of family happiness . To do this, you need to not only determine the reasons for the behavior of your husband, but also draw the appropriate conclusions.
- So, if you know about any chronic diseases of your husband or see his malaise, do not start itching in his ear, something begging. Better take care of his health, get a medicine or consult a doctor.
- Often during disputes, spouses forget about the subject of the conversation, from the side it may seem that they find out which of them is smarter and more learned. Learn to catch yourself in such moments, stop meaningless squabbles, they still will not help to solve the problem. It is better to take a pause, look at the situation on both sides and choose the words to reach an agreement that suits both.
- Try to understand why your husband thinks it possible to raise your voice, learn about his family values. Ask about what's bothering him now - men often can not find the strength to tell their own reasons for their discontent, they certainly need leading questions. But you still want to talk out.
- Work on your self-esteem, learn to respect yourself, show him that he will not achieve anything by shouting: "Well, you shouted at me, then what? What did you achieve? ". Soon you will notice that not all the harsh words of your husband that have been pissing you off, are now reaching their goal.
- Help to raise self-esteem and husband, let him believe in himself - a self-sufficient person does not need to assert himself at someone else's expense. Praise your husband (only without flattery), become his friend, who always and in all will support. Let him know - whatever happens to him at the doorstep of an apartment, his houses are always waiting and loved.
- Persuade him to start playing sports - let him take the irritation not by shouting, but by pounding the pear.
- After another quarrel with her husband, do not run to him to be reconciled, as if you yourself are to blame for everything, let him survive all that happened, realize that his fault in the conflict is also there. And when the passion subsides, you can return to an unpleasant conversation.