Each mother would like her baby to grow up healthy, happy and never knew the bitterness of loss. But this is how our world works, that sooner or later a child faces death. How can you tell a child about death in order to form a correct attitude to this phenomenon and, in any case, not to scare? How to help a child survive the care of loved ones? Answers to these difficult questions are searched in our article.
When to talk to a child about death?
Up to a certain point, the issues of life and death of the child do not care in principle. He simply lives, actively learns the world, mastering in passing all kinds of knowledge and skills. Only after having obtained a certain life experience, observing the annual cycle of plant life and, of course, receiving information from the television screen, the baby comes to the conclusion that death is the inevitable end of any life. In itself, this knowledge of the child is absolutely not scary and does not even cause much interest. And only when faced with death closely, whether the loss of a relative, a beloved animal or an accidentally seen funeral, the child begins to be actively interested in everything that is connected with this phenomenon. And it is during this period that parents need to answer clearly, calmly and truthfully all the questions that arise in the child. Very often, after hearing the child's questions about death, parents become frightened and try to change the subject to a different topic, or, even worse, start asking with prejudice who put these "stupid" thoughts in the child's head. Do not do this! To feel safe, the child simply needs information, because nothing so scares as the unknown. Therefore, parents should be prepared to give the child the necessary explanations in an accessible form.
How to tell a child about death?
- The basic rule of this difficult conversation is that the adult should be absolutely calm. It is in this case that the child will be able to ask all questions of interest to him.
- Tell a child about death in a language that is accessible to him. After the conversation, the child should not have a feeling of understatement. Each question should be answered by several understandable child phrases, without long abstract reasoning. Choose the phrase for the conversation should be based on the personal characteristics of the baby. But, in any case, the story should not scare the child.
- Tell the child about death will help the image of the immortal soul, which is present in all religions. It is he who will help the child cope with his fears, inspire hope.
- The child will necessarily have questions about what happens to the body after death. You need to answer them as frankly. It is worth mentioning that after the heart stopped, a person is buried, and relatives come to the cemetery to look after the grave and remember the deceased.
- Be sure to reassure the baby that although all people ever die, but it usually happens in old age, after a long life.
- Do not be scared if the kid perseveres
Returns to the theme of death, asking more and more new questions. This only indicates that he has not yet figured out everything for himself.
Should I tell a child about the death of a loved one?
Psychologists in this issue are unanimous: the child has the right to know the truth. Although many parents also tend to hide from the baby care from the lives of loved ones, trying to protect him from unnecessary emotions, this is wrong. Do not also hide death behind the stereotyped phrases "Gone from us", "I fell asleep forever," "He is no more." Instead of calming the child, these common phrases can cause fears and nightmares. It's better to honestly say that a person has died. Do not try to pretend that nothing has happened - it is better to help the child survive the loss .