Surely in your childhood you had events that seemed to be the most terrible at that time, which could only happen. And of which you remember today with a smile. Or do not remember at all. Why is it sometimes so hard for us to throw out other events? Why some memories are so painful. And they torment us, sometimes for years. How to forget past grievances, mistakes, overdue relationships - we'll talk about this today.
Of course, constantly repeating "I want to forget the past," you are unlikely to succeed. Moreover, you do not need to forget something to make life easier. After all, you remember quite a lot of hard things today. Why? Because the past must not be forgotten, but accepted. Change its attitude to it, leave it where it was, ie. in past.
In fact, it sounds simple, but practice shows that many of us can not cope without special techniques. Let's find out how you can mitigate the pain of loss.
Tip # 1, from which you will learn how to forget a bad past by viewing it several times
This method is suitable for creative people, with a good imagination. With its help, you can forget both past grievances and your mistakes:
- find a time and a place where no one will distract you;
- sit comfortably, relax. Imagine yourself an outsider in the cinema. Try to remove from your mind any emotions, well, except for a weak interest: what will this show now;
- get out of memory the event to which you need to change your attitude;
- scroll it, as if the whole action was shot on the camera, i.e. you see yourself and everything that happens from the outside;
- an important condition: your film should be black and white and without sound. Instead, it's funny music and titles, like, for example, in comedies with Charlie Chaplin;
- do not forget to insert laughter onlookers;
- From time to time, reverse what is happening backwards. Laugh, if it suddenly becomes ridiculous, and do not forget that you are an outside observer. And you can be ridiculous;
- Scroll the movie until the picture stops scarying you.
This method helps to remove fear and discomfort in memories. You just correct it a little.
Board number 2, where you learn that bad memories can be laid with a brick
Let's forget the past, laying it good events? Imagine that everything that happens in your life is laid out with bricks. A negative memory is just one of them. How to forget the past love, if you stay at home all the time, do nothing and sigh. Be active: lay in every day more bright and joyful moments. Do you know that not only does a good mood cause a smile? This mechanism also acts in the opposite direction. Smile more often, and your mood will improve. Sign up for foreign language courses or, for example, Argentine tango. The less time you have for memories, the sooner it will disappear under the layer of cheerful bricks of your new, no doubt, better life.
Tip # 3. Let's say bad memories ... thanks
Probably, this will not be easy, but this method is directly related to the recognition of responsibility.