Every child sooner or later enters the children's collective with all the joys and difficulties of communication and building relationships that flow from here. Conflict situations are inevitable, and it is at preschool and school age that a person develops the ability to find a compromise or defend his position in order to constructively build interaction with other people.
Unfortunately, or fortunately, not all members of the children's collective are friendly. On the contrary, if adults try to hide their dislike for colleagues, neighbors and acquaintances, level the existing differences, then children have conflicts suddenly and sharply, verbal and non-verbal aggression occurs when the kid rushes on the objectionable with his fists, bites or pinches him , throws objects that have turned up under his arm.
Conflict resolution in children under 5 years old
Psychologists are ambivalent about whether to teach the child to give change. But most believe that a child of junior and middle preschool age can not distinguish between the concepts of "protection" and "attack", inadequately responds to the situation that has arisen. A kid can, for example, attack another child only because he has outstripped him and took the coveted toy earlier, or to push with all his might inadvertently grazed him. A small child can not calculate his strength, assess the opponent and his capabilities. Moreover, he is not able to foresee the consequences of the skirmish. Thus, teaching the child to give change, we endanger not only his possible opponent, but himself, because the enemy can be stronger. It is better to teach a young child in difficult situations to seek help from an adult who is nearby, for example, a kindergarten teacher.
Conflict resolution in children of senior preschool and primary school age
By the age of 5, children begin to form elementary ethical ideas, conscious regulation of their own actions, assessment of the behavior of surrounding people. But before the age of 7, his assessment is still quite dependent on adults. At this age, special emphasis should be placed on teaching the child precisely to protection, and not to attack. In addition, if the child is sufficiently independent , he gradually moves to the level when he solves most of the problems that arise on his own, using his social experience and parents' advice. It is important to introduce the baby to the ways of responding to the emerging misunderstanding, emphasizing the ability to negotiate.
How to help a child if he has problems?
It is impossible to exclude the occurrence of situations when the child is obstructed in the children's team. Sensitive parents will notice that the child has problems in his depressed mood, unwillingness to attend an educational institution, or lack of friends. And if a child comes in bruises and scratches, his personal items are "lost" or "spoiled" regularly and pocket money disappears, then preventive measures should be taken.
- It is necessary to call the child to a frank conversation, promising him not to do anything without informing him.
- If the child has problems due to the fact that he is different in something from his peers, for example, the mother puts seven-year-old boy on pantyhose, and he is teased for it, then the object of discord should be removed.
- It is necessary to create conditions for the child's communication with peers outside the school, allowing to invite friends into the house, organizing joint holidays, etc.
- It is necessary to encourage the participation of the child in general classroom activities, otherwise he will be excluded from the circle of communication.
- Educators should be made their allies.
- It is necessary to develop the child physically, but at the same time emphasize that the disputable issues are better solved by words.
You can not completely protect the child from the complexities of the surrounding world, but you can teach him to act adequately the situation that arises and solve problems constructively.