Manners, if you believe many dictionaries, is a special behavior - pretentious and unnatural. This is typical not only of many girls, but also of guys who are often mistaken for gays, regardless of their sexual orientation. Often, the lack of simplicity and naturalness, mannerism delivers a lot of problems to girls and boys.
How does the mannerisms look from the outside?
Manners give a very ugly external picture: a man who pulls out his little finger, holding a fork, or has a habit of rolling his eyes and strongly gesturing, talking with MKhATovsky dramatism, looks as if he tries to correspond to some incomprehensible canons. In other words, such a person is like a rustic, who was accidentally allowed to enter a social dinner.
Of course, it is very unpleasant to realize such traits behind oneself. All these mannerisms, pretentiousness, lack of simplicity and naturalness, and repel people. Often a person tries to control himself , but this only makes things worse, and stupid grimaces and grins come out somehow spontaneously, from nerves.
How to get rid of mannerisms?
To begin with, try to determine where you generally took this manner of holding on. After all, how to get rid of the mannerisms, if you do not understand its origins? Observe the parents, relatives - often the manner of communication we are taking from them.
The second vector - pay attention to your favorite films and cartoons. The more mannered their heroes, the more likely that your behavior is based on their influence.
Try to surround yourself with normal, from your point of view, people, watch serious films with good actors. The more examples of simple behavior you see, the more natural your changes will be.
It would be nice to shoot yourself on camera and pay attention to what phrases and gestures you especially spoil. Remember them and remember in a situation where you can fall and repeat them.
Often, the mannerisms come from self-doubt . Start a notebook, in which daily you enter a few of your strengths, successes, all that people appreciate in you and appreciate in yourself you. Rereading such records, it will be easier for you to believe in yourself and feel at ease - which will allow you to hold naturally.
Some people in this situation even turn to a psychologist - but the psychologist will not be able to change your behavior for you, he will only show you the direction. So first try to help yourself.